Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
