I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
I just found puke in my bra..
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
