i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
God I need to hump something, right now.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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