My nipple is on Facebook.
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
My balls are so social today.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Randomize
