Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
Randomize
