Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
