Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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