im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
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