it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
