someone get that fucking seahorse.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
