I want to walk on stilts...naked
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
apparently the secret to your success is patron
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Randomize
