Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
