Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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