i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
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