(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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