it wasn't lemon gatorade
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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