Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
