You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
Randomize
