More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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