i barfeds in our rink
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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