remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
my shit smells like andre
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
