windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
I'm passing your future prison.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
Randomize
