My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
