Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
Randomize
