hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
Randomize
