It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Randomize