Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
Randomize
