that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
Randomize
