I called the bartender Mr. Intoxication last night. He thought it was funny until i threw up and blamed it on him
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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