If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize
