There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
I think a kid would responsible me up
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Randomize
