Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Randomize
