we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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