Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
