Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Randomize
