is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
