Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
Randomize
