So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
Randomize
