I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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