I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
