We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
You know you need to hit the gym when you're not strong enough to get the cork outta the wine bottle. And you know you're a drunk when that's the only motivation to do exercises
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
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