so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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