Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
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