Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
