Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
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