last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
