i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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