Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
Randomize