So I answered the door in my underwear expecting my boyfriend. Instead I opened the door to Mormon missionaries. Do you think that was a sign from God?
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
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