he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
Randomize