Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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